Top 10 Inappropriate Kids’ T-Shirts

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Is your kid’s birthday coming up? Are you unsure what to buy them? Well, we have great news for you, as we have 10 perfect t-shirt ideas for you to choose from. Just be warned that you may turn a few heads, hear a few tuts and you will probably receive a call from social services if your child wears one though.

Yeah, the social services call is a little too far (we wouldn’t risk it though), but you may be currently thinking: What the hell were they thinking when they designed and created these tops. They come in children’s sizes so they are obviously marketed towards them – either that or midgets. We guess muscle men who love to wear really tight fitting t-shirts may qualify too.

But, you also need to thinking that it’s us as adults with the dirty minds rather than the t-shirt designers. After all, it’s us that think they are inappropriate because of their sexual innuendos.

More than likely your child won’t even get the joke behind the slogans, and if they did, it looks like they start sex education earlier than we did in school.

10. S..E..X


This t-shirt has got to be fake…hasn’t it? If not, we cannot understand how the creator of the t-shirt would ever think that it would have been appropriate for children to wear with those initials on. Is it supposed to stand for something – maybe a cartoon or something? Let us know if you know.

9. Future Footballers Wife


I guess you best start your kid young as no one wants to marry a guy who has no money. As Fergie once said: “If you ain’t got no money take yo’ broke ass home.” I guess it also helps to play football as the t-shirt implies, as women love footballers too. While we are on the subject, the TV series was terrible. But how would we know that, as we never watched it, right? :)

8. If I Don’t Hear You Say No, It Doesn’t Count


If only the same excuse worked in court then a certain register would be a lot emptier. “Please Sir, I didn’t hear her say no, so it doesn’t count.“ As you can probably tell, the inappropriate kids’ t-shirt is supposed to be aimed at parents when their kid does something it shouldn’t. However, we prefer it to mean the other thing as it made us LOL.

7. Juicy


The name “Juicy” is in fact the name of the brand and in itself isn’t too bad of a name. But combine that with a small girl’s t-shirt where the writing is across the chest then there is a slight concern. We guess it’s up to you parents on this one as many of you may not have a problem with this design.

6. Nothing Says “I Love You” Quite Like Fisting


We are guessing when they say “fisting” they mean fist pumping. But are they aware that there are two types of fisting? As soon as we read the t-shirt the other type came to mind straight away. We reckon back in the day your Nan received some quite often. Then again, she still does, and we would know. :)

5. Here Comes The Rope


The word that you are thinking says “rape”, in fact actually says “rope”. But with how the “O” is joined-up, it’s not clear at all and it looks like an “A”. The t-shirt is part of some kind of scout, and as you know, scouts love their knots. It just makes you think “sh#t, that’s kind of bad” when you first glance at the t-shirt.

4. I Get Around


You get around? Where do you get around? You need to be more exact. Oh, the boys in the school yard. Why didn’t you just say that? We know who does get around…our Uncle John…on his lawnmower. Inappropriate as the kids’ t-shirt looks, at least it has what looks like Batman on a bike. It could have been a lot worse…like your Mum’s yeast infection.

3. If the Broom Fits, Ride It


We guess this children’s t-shirt isn’t that inappropriate really. And it’s only you people with the filthy minds that will even get this one. Remember: You like your t-shirts like you like your bassline – utter filthy and dirty. Yeah, we know. That was a perfect place for a momma joke.

2. Kiss The Rim


Kiss the what now? Haha! We couldn’t even make this stuff up if we tried. The slogan shouldn’t be too hard to figure out, but if you don’t see it, it’s what your gay Uncles do every night. What makes the t-shirt even more inappropriate is the fact that you can clearly see it in the child’s section. And even with the basketball hoop, it makes no difference.

1. You Must be Taller Than This to Ride


A t-shirt that should have been innocent with a popular theme park sign logo that all theme parks have, can easily send the wrong message. Even looking on the t-shirt it says “Kings Island” which implies it was bought there. Wearing the t-shirt around a theme park would probably bring no complications, but as soon as your kids wears that puppy at home while with you, boy will you as a parent receive some dagger stares.

From innocent mistakes in judgement, to sex offenders working as fashion designers, what is your take on our top ten inappropriate children’s attire? Do you blame the parents for allowing their children to wear t-shirts such as the above, or do you believe us as a society need to learn to have a little fun and not think too much into everything?